Tara and I had been watching Bridgette Jones. It was girls night and we had been talking, laughing, and drinking our way through the whole movie. I was wasted even by my own standards and Tara was at least as far gone as I was when the movie ended.
“I fucking love that movie,” Tara set her wineglass down and laughed. “I mean, I’m not a huge fan of Hugh Grant, but I would fuck the shit out of Colin Firth.” Her eyes were swimming.
I clicked the remote and leaned back on the couch. Tara had come over to my place because she was at the bottom of her rope. She had lost her job as a hostess a few weeks before and she hadn’t been able to pick up another one. Of course, her boyfriend, one of the cooks at the restaurant before it closed, had also just broken up with her. And I seemed to be her only friend.
“Yeah, he’s yummy,” I smiled and held my glass out for a refill.
“I have a confession,” Tara finished filling my glass. “I am going to be a cam girl.” She leaned back on the couch.
“A cam girl?” I thought about the little adverts I had seen on various, porn sites. “Wow, ok,” I sounded judgy even though I didn’t mean too, “how does that work exactly?”
Tara took a long sip of the wine and grinned. “It’s stupid easy. I mean, all I do is set up a webcam thing, log on to this website, and then start chatting with every pervert that clicks on my picture. They can pay extra and I can go solo with them, which is where the real money’s at apparently, but all I do is, you know dress sexy and type, maybe show a boob or something until I get a private room request. But after that, things get hawwwt.” She rolled her eyes.
I stared at her. “So, like a strip tease?”
She grinned and shook her head. “Oh no, this is more than a strip tease.”
I couldn’t really get my head around it, I mean, I understood what it was she was going to be doing, but I didn’t really get how you got a job like this in the first place. “Was there like an interview or something? Did you have to audition?”
“Not yet. I just called today and talked to the manager, at least I guess she was the manager. She said I had to come audition for her at her office.” Tara took another big swig of wine.
“A woman, huh?
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Since then I have joined other sites, Iâ€™ve moved out, my boundaries have moved, I started talking out loud regularly on cam-something thatâ€™s helped me to find my voice more in normal life. I still go on and enjoy myself often, but having to make rent makes nights of making nothing less easy to brush off, and my tolerance for idiots and freeloaders has gone down substantially, though all the annoying men are made up for by genuinely lovely ones Iâ€™d be sad not to have in my life.
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